The Break

Ok, so as you know... I'm still battling this cold and sinus infection... which is why you're not seeing any posts about running or diet lately... my diet has been pretty bland though... not a lot tastes very good when you're sick so it's easy to eat well.  And we just got a big snow storm ... so even if I were well, I would only be inside on the elliptical or wii fitness games anyhow.  So needless to say I've been spending a lot of time in bed lately and in doing so I just caught an episode of MTV's new reality-documentary, The Break!


I don't know if you've seen it yet, but it was worth a watch.  You'll meet Anne Malhum, a young woman (and Runner) who has a desire to help the homeless... in particular the very young homeless who have found themselves pushed out of their homes before they had a chance to finish school or make some sort of way for themselves.  She not only counsels these youth and helps them find solutions to their problems, such as where they might find their next meal, or bed... but also how they might find a job in order to provide what they need for themselves.  In addition, she gives them each a pair of new running shoes and invites them to run with her!  She feels that by strengthening them through running, it might help them, like it does for her... to feel strong enough to conquer other goals and obstacles in their lives!


YES!!!!

Thank you Anne Mulhum!!  I completely get it!  It's not enough for these youth to get a bed, or a meal, a new outfit or even a job... they must feel like they deserve it!  They must feel like they are worth that and more!  They must feel empowered!  You must ignite their spark if you want them to truly seize the 'Break' they've been given!!


Now it doesn't have to be running, but I relate because that's what I get from running too!  Running has always made me feel strong and capable and those feelings, that spark ignited... transcends to every area and person in your life!  I hope to one day be strong enough to not only do this for myself but for those around me!


I'm wondering how many other Mom's out there are feeling sluggish and tired and old?!  How many of you just want to 'run away' from home most days!?  How many of you wish you could have more energy, less weight and feel more happy and positive?!  Being a Mom means we sacrifice on a daily basis our wants and needs often times for those we love and nurture.  And that means ANYONE and EVERYONE but ourselves.  Somehow, we Mom's need to find a way to start including OURSELF into that equation as if we are our own best friend, child, spouse, mother, father, grandparent, dog, cat.... whatever!?  Usually even the pet's needs take priority over our own!?  Am I right?!


Then we wonder how we got here, what's wrong with us!?  Why can't we just be happy?!  We have so much to be happy for?!  


We're not happy because even though this is our life... we don't feel like we're in control of it!  
We don't feel like we have options!  We feel like we are stuck, because what happens if I leave?!  Their father, my mother,... the babysitter... whomever... doesn't know every little thing about my child like I do... how will they manage!?  And besides, if I do what I want to, that kinda makes me selfish and a bad Mom, right!?  Seriously, we are our own worst enemies.... well, not quite... other Mother's can be our worser enemies... watching and judging us to make themselves feel better.  I've never met a more unhappy bunch then the Mom's.  I've never been more unhappy then I am now, as a Mom!
It's not the kids fault.  We love them!  We would die for them!  We would do it all again, for them!  It's just that we've forgotten about ourselves in the mix of all the balls we juggle!  We've forgotten that we too, are people, individuals with thoughts, ideas, hobbies, passions, goals, dreams, needs, wants.... we have them!  


Or maybe I just have a mouse in my pocket?!  We,weee, weeeeeeee.... maybe it's just me!?


But if I'm not wrong, and you are a Mom reading this now... I hope you'll take some time today just for you!
Think about whatever it is that empowers you and what it would take to ignite that spark in you!!


If you think it could be running/walking or crawling... join me!  
I want to start a Mom's running group, "Mom's On the RUN!"  or M.O.T.R. and our slogan can be "JUST RUN, RUN AWAY!!"  :)   And yes Kristin, our theme song can most definitely be Sister Christian - by Night Ranger...
"Motor Revved... what's your price for flight.... you'll be all right tonight...."   HAhaha....
I'm kidding, but I'm serious... let's do it!  We can start small and train for a 5K or maybe one of those fun muddy runs where you get to drink beer, camp out and party after?!  Who's with me?

Postponing the Inevitable

Today was going to be my 'BIG Picture' day where I take the dreaded "Before" picture and post it here along with my weight and measurements for the world to see!  (EEK!)  I know I'm crazy!  But if I'm gonna do it, freak'n do it right, right?!  BUT, I woke up with an awful sinus infection and I'm still rock'n this strep throat... so I'm giving myself a pass... for today!  Tomorrow, it's on... or off,... with the clothes.  :/

So for today, I'll share with you my 'experience' on my last run... a couple days ago before I got sick.
I was running the paths behind my house... they're about 3 miles total, winding around a creek and nature preserve that extends through a bunch of homes in our development.  There are deer, coyote, beaver, raccoons, rabbits and more!  It's really beautiful when it's not so dreary out... the picture below is crappy, took it with my laptop camera on photo booth... but you get the idea!  With a view like this from my master bedroom, it's been taunting me for the last 6 years... come run me, come run me!  I have a few times, but not on a regular basis like I'd like.

So I'm out here running and instead of feel'n the vibes from my jams or enjoying the beautiful scenery I'm focused on my freak'n fat tummy!  My waist band can't seem to stay put... it's either above the roll or below it and either way, the fat is NOT secure!  Ewe... all I feel is this fat stomach bouncing up and down while I run!  I don't understand, I imagined this going a lot more like this:

and a lot less like this:

But hey, you gotta start somewhere!

I kept trying to encourage myself, "you're a lot further along than anyone on the couch right now" or something to the effect that I had read earlier on Pinterest.  But it didn't help.  All I could think about and all I could feel was ashamed!  How could I let myself get to this point.  I felt embarrassed and ashamed, and grossed out!  All this negative chatter just swirling around in my head began to make my shoulders tight and my body stiff, and my feet heavy!  I stopped at the creek on the bridge to stretch out.  Suddenly there was something more beautiful before me that completely took my mind off of how ugly I felt!
It was a Cardinal!
Now, I don't know if you have ever seen a cardinal?  This is only the 2nd one I've seen in the 6 years I've lived here... but against the bare brown branches and white sky... snow on the ground, it's a brilliant sight!  I've always felt like running puts me closer to God.  In nature.  It really can feel spiritual at times and it's one of the things I love most about it.  We just sat there for a minute, this cardinal and I ... staring at each other.  I began to feel better.  Silly even, for feeling so crappy only moments before that.

I mean really, I have given birth to 3 beautiful little people!  I have nurtured and nursed these three little people for the past 6 years straight with the very same body I created them from, and you know what!?  SCREW the fat roll!  Who cares!?  Do I want it gone!?  Sure!  But in the whole scheme of things... I am damn proud of my body and what it is capable of!  What it's done!  And so what if I'm a little heavier for it... ok, a lot heavier.
At the end of the day, I'd do it all again!  It was just what I needed that red bird!  Reminding me of the beauty of life.  When you see something bright in the darkness, it's just a beacon of hope!  Keep the faith!
I ran on!  I was lighter on my feet, my head was held high, I had tears on my cheeks and a bounce in my step!  Free!  Freedom!  This is what it's about!  Free yourself from the negative clutter that fills your time and brain, and just be!
I kid you not, that bird followed me, hoping from tree to tree, until I reached the end of the path and continued by road about 200 meters up.   I felt like I was in a cartoon or something...where the birds sing along and land on your finger!?
It may not seem like a big deal, but in that moment... it was magic!

Gearing Up!

So... being that it's been nearly 15 years since I've really ran or trained.  And seeing that I am a good 50 pounds heavier than I was then.  Considering that I have high arches, I pronate, my gait is weird, I have weird bones all over my feet that rub wrong.  I have fractures in my spine, torn cartilage in both knees... arthritis in my neck, feet and hands and really bad Sciatica.  I probably shouldn't be running at all.  Quite frankly, it is one of the worst things you can do to your joints and body... but at this point, this extra weight I'm carrying isn't healthy either.

Since running is the one physical activity I've always enjoyed... I've decided to just proceed with caution.
One of the most important things you can do as a runner is to purchase the correct running shoe for you!  This is so much easier said than done however, even with the help of trained professionals!  You will probably shell out a small fortune just finding the right shoes.... but the way I look at it, it's cheaper than all of rehab and physical therapy I would need later for injuries.  And since the shoes are only gently used when you figure out they're not the perfect match you can possibly recoup some of your losses on ebay, craigslist or the like.  Here was an article I finally found that helped me figure out what type of shoe I would need.
http://www.sierratradingpost.com/lp2/running-shoe-guide/

So when shopping for my new running shoes, I went straight to Nike.  Because 15 years ago, they made my favorite running shoe!  Well a lot has changed since then and Nike no longer seems to work for me!  I think I tried all of them on and bought 2 different pair before I accepted this fact.  No more Nike!?  But what's a girl to do!?  I am a running shoe orphan... and there are so many options out there!

I started reading reviews and articles about finding the right shoe.  It seems my problem is that I need both a cushion shoe and a support shoe, to my knowledge you can't get both?!
The third pair of shoes I bought were Asics.   They got great reviews but they just didn't work for me.  I had pain throughout my entire body from doing 5 miles of walking... just walking!  I developed plantar fasciitis previously and these shoes seemed to make it worse!
So next I tried the Brooks.  I thought for sure, this is the shoe!  I had a professional help me pick them out.  I loved the way they felt in the store!  They fixed my pronating problem and supported my arches... they felt great!  Then I got out on the trails.  OUCH!  I couldn't run more than a half mile with out feeling pain under my knees and especially in my shins!  I felt like I had to stop running or I'd get shin splints, but I wasn't winded or tired . I felt like I could keep running if it weren't for these particular pains.  This is what led me to believe that I had the wrong shoe... even though at this point, I felt like it was my problem.  There must be something wrong with me!?  I had shelled out over $400 already and still hadn't found what I needed.  I was discouraged and frustrated!  Really, it would have been so easy for me just to throw in the towel right here and say I am too old, too fat, too broken and I can't do this!!

Instead, I decided to do some more research.  Surely, I couldn't be the only person out there having trouble with their shoes?!  I wondered, how many people have simply put on any old shoe and tried to run... felt pain and quit.  How many people have assumed they are not a runner or they can't run, simply because they were in the wrong shoes?!

I found a thread on Runner's World about 'barefoot running.'  It got me thinking about the way I was coached and trained to run in high school and how it most likely led to so many of my injuries.  I was always taught to run heel to toe!  You drive off your heels and roll off your toes, with long strides!

While it might look pretty, it doesn't make a lot of sense and causes more problems and impact on your body and joints.  Really, for the least amount of pain, strain or injury... we should be leaning slightly forward, taking shorter strides and landing on the middle of our feet, rolling off our toes.  There is a shoe FOR ALL FOOT TYPES that supports just this style of running and it's made my Newton!  I swear they are not paying me to write this... but Newton if you're reading and want to advertise here (and send me free shoes) ;), you can gladly have the space!
But seriously, I feel indebted to them for creating such an incredible shoe!  I know a lot of runner's find them unstable and weird, I'm usually in the minority for most things... but they work for me!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1fBh2qH4QbM

I got the Newton Trail shoe and I love them... they're really bright... but honestly, I like that part too! :)
They're pricey, but worth every penny!
Here's is THE shoe for me... finally!  :)
http://www.roadrunnersports.com/rrs/products/NWT115/

This was my fifth running shoe purchase, so I finally found a website that allows you to exchange your shoes within 60 days of purchase, no questions asked... if they're not the right shoe for you!  Course, I found the right shoe on this purchase and wont need to... but why oh why did I not find them for my other 4 purchases?!
Here's a link to their website if you're interested and you can get 10% with this special link:

http://www.roadrunnersports.com/rrs/offer/referAfriend.jsp?tellapal.id=9fbc2abf-8b5d-4276-93a4-b45048b1dfa1&e=melgrimsug%40yahoo.com&f=Melisa&l=Sugden&dist_src=facebook&fb_source=message

If you sign up for VIP, I think it's like $1.99... you get free, faster shipping, and discounts off the shoes!  I saved $13 even with the $1.99 VIP membership due.  I was impressed when I received my new shoes too that they included a return address label with the POSTAGE PAID!  Unbelievable!  They will pay to have you send your used shoes back if they don't work?!  Wow, pretty amazing customer service, again I kicked myself for not buying my previous 4 pairs there.  They were awesome with my order too! I had to call and cancel the first one after reading reviews that Newton's run a FULL size larger than you would usually wear, so I am a 7 and a half, I bought 8's... I had to call, cancel and reorder 8 and a half's. They handled it no problem and got them out the same day!  I can't say enough great things about this company, I'll be buying all of my running shoes here for now on!  They also participate with I Give... a fundraising opportunity where a percentage of your purchase is donated to the charity of your choice.  You must however, install the IGive button on your computer.
http://www.igive.com/

My first run on the Newton's I ran nearly 3 miles... only had to stop a few times, but not due to the shoe! Simply because I couldn't breath and had to cough up a lung as if I had been smoking my whole life!  Seriously out of shape here folks!

Next I headed over to Amazon and purchased a pedometer watch!  It only set me back around $30.  And it tells time, keeps track of your heart rate,  has a stop watch, counts calories and fat burned, tells you your speed, distance etc... it'll really help me to keep accurate stats on my training runs.

I've been researching training programs and proper diets.... I'll be getting into that more soon, but for now we're battling strep throat this week so I'm laying low with chicken soup!

So I'm all geared up to go now and ready to run!

If you are local and ever feel like walking or running with me... trust me, I'm slow... just let me know!  Or if you're interested in running the race with me!?  I'd love a buddy!

Happy Trails,
~Mel